我愛你，最重要。

那是另一面,另一個生活圈.
也可能只是一個PARTY!

"下午要練習嗎?"
"你不是沒時間?"
"有啊!可是要早一點,我們DEPARTMENT有固定的聚會"
"幾點?"
"兩點半好不好?"
"好啊!" 從來,對於這種差半個小時的時間,我不會有什麼不好.
"那練習結束之後,你要不要一起來我們DEPARTMENT的活動?"

I was sososo surprised when Heather told me that she bought a cake for me.
"What for?"
"For your graduation!!"
我瞪大了眼,感動莫名,我們不是常常見面的朋友,她卻總是很貼心.
幾天前,我跟胡婷在樓梯口聊了幾句,鵬輝大力相助辦了一個POTLUCK!!
幾個朋友都來了,除了有事跑到科羅拉多去的凡奇跟鈺莉.Stephen也來了.
原本只是開開玩笑的說,就當是我的畢業party.
Heather was so sweet!! She brought a cake to me!!
Potluck 我們遲到了,到的時候大家也都吃半飽了,我很興奮的跟大家說了Heather的禮物.
跟這群人在一起最輕鬆了,大家有話直說,不拐彎不抹腳,不耍心機. 鵬輝跟羅毅是我最先認識的,陸怡跟翁偉俊是最照顧我的後媽後爸,胡婷是氣味相投的開朗直爽大姊,程瑛總是安安靜靜的觀察,方蕾才剛認識卻也很投緣.這群人裡,我年紀最小,大家也就自然而然把我當小妹照顧.

I can't really tell what makes Stephen become a little different after I came back from New York. Feel a little different but still.
無庸置疑,我在乎他的感受.雖然我能然是做著自己的事情,他偶爾還是會冒出來.

上星期三,因為他的失約,我選擇留在家裡休息,沒有去Brazil跳舞.I told him that I was too tired to go. Anyway, we both know the reason that I am not going even though I didn't tell.

Last Friday, I invited Martina to my place for some coffee. We talked about my dance with Stephen, some interaction with him, and also the reason that I didn't go to Brazil on Wednesday. I sort of asking Martina whether she cares if Stephen and I went out. Her reponse was totally fine even it seemed not fine at all. She cares about him otherwise she would had let go.

Came back from NY on Tuesday, Hsin-I, Nitin, Stephen and I had dinner together on Wednesday. Well, something different in his mind. I know but what's that? Wednesday night, as usual, Brazil. Honestly, I was so happy that Hsin-I could make it. Talked with God Mother, I decided not to tell Martina anything about Stephen anymore. Things should only between us, me and Stephen.

Thursday, I was so tired after the long trip in New York. After Hsin-I's taking off. Slept until 3pm. still wondering whether I should go to the salsa class. My body moved automatically dressed up, walked out, and went to the class. The class was only fine to me 'cos I didn't feel the connection. It has been a while since I came back from NY. What's wrong?! Somehow, I know it's natural. We both are still "looking"

"我在Center City 跟朋友吃飯." 他說. 在我下了課打電話給他的時候.
WHAT!!我不爽的情緒開始冒了上來.

"So...you're not going to Brazil tonight?"
"I wanna go...but I will have presentation tonight. It's gonna be too late after my presentation."
"I won't go to the first class tonight so I will go on 9:30. Will you be finished the class?"
"Mmm...9:30, I think so."
"We can go from 9:30."
"Sure!"
"Call me after your class, I will wait for you."

前一個星期五,跑到La Luna去跳舞,他拿著餐巾紙,開玩笑得幫我擦手汗,接著拿著紙巾幫我擦汗,沿著臉.
我接過紙巾,幫自己又拭了幾下,他說自己很會流汗,我拿著紙巾也在他額頭上擦了幾下.

那時候,我跳得累了,不喜歡對方貼著我的身體廝磨.走離開舞池,向他伸出手,他自然而然的拉過我的手,牽著,兩個人站在一起,一會才放開.
喜歡一些小細節,開瓶蓋的小細節,我講電話很溫柔他的調侃.

為了跟Martina去聽一場音樂會,跑到downtwon去跟Phyllis拿PENN card.
晚餐時分接到Stephen的電話,問我要不要一起去Nitin家吃晚餐.因為事先約好的音樂會,很遺憾只能回絕了.
整場音樂會,都想著他.跟martina卻沒辦法說,前任男女朋友的關係加上一個好朋友.

The streets look so dangerous!!
開著車, 轉著轉著路漸漸暗了, 週遭的黑人越來越多, 跟著地圖尋找著今天晚上的目的地.
Stephen is so crazy about Salsa.
他把訊尋轉給大家, 採自動報名制. 每次有SALSA的活動,他總是特別熱衷, 傳訊息EMAIL, setting up the schedule, and
driving us around.

還沒說說Stephen 這個人呢! 我總想回去把空白的日記補上, 記下那些溫馨的小細節, 好感覺總是想留下一些些印記.
先說昨晚吧!

Stephen, Nitin, Martina and me. Martina is a close friend of mine and is the ex-gf of Stephen.

March 4, 2005

前天, 在台灣的網友問我: 是否, 還會想念很忙碌的那個人.
昨晚, 跟朋友去跳SALSA, 在CLUB裡跟好友提了這件事.
好友覺得好笑, 說: 那是什麼時候的人啦!陷在早就換....我預期她會說出一個名字, 她的前男友. 她停頓了一下,說....現在早就改朝換代了.
我笑說, 對啊! 誰還管他啊!
那個忙碌的男人, 似乎已經消失在我的生活中了, 歸屬於既熟悉又陌生的代名詞, 朋友.

最近, 似乎完全換了一個生活圈.
教太極拳, 學SALSA, CPA EXAM, 三件事情把生活填得滿滿的.

今年的費城不冷  跟去年冬天的三場大風雪比起來
今天膝蓋高的雪  是小巫見大巫了
三月要離開  趕在離開前可以看到這場大雪也算是值得了

一覺醒來天地為之變色 白茫茫的費城 半夢半醒很安靜很乾淨  一點都不廢
打了電話給朋友-妙  難得有人我願意約出門去賞雪的 

    

前幾天朋友的男友-張  即將前往英國攻讀博士過道費城來探女友  
張在耶誕節前夕來陪女友兩個多月 有幾次三人一起吃飯喝咖啡  因此張跟我也相熟